Clash of the 2 Tonnes…..Week 8

So by now we should all be well on our way to a slimmer, healthy Team ACCL…shouldn’t we….ahem…shouldn’t we????

8 glorious weeks on and just what is it about dieting and women that makes it sooo hard to actually set out and do what it says on on the tin and actually lose some weight…or even just inches?  That would be equally as good!

So far it is definitely Team Blue that are winning in the slimming stakes….(still can’t type that word without thinking chips and onion rings…STAKES..flippin STAKES….not Steaks !!!!)  Boss Connors is winning by a mile…..he has even had to buy new jeans as he was in danger of the others slipping far lower than even fashion will allow….not a good look on your more mature fella !!  Through gritted teeth I can now report that he has lost a further 5 3/4 lb this week! that’s a whopping 40lb overall since starting his Lighter Life diet of gruel and birdfood bars…quite an achievement….immense willpower needed to eat that shite for so long!!  The added bonus is that he appears to have stopped snoring at night according to his sleeping partner 🙂  she has not had to vacate the bed in the middle of the night – result! so is it win win win?  What have been the downsides??  From my own point of view i’m none too keen on that glint in his eye when I pass something to him…..i’m sure that he is seeing my arm as a Chicken drumstick?!  Visitors to the office do not realise the risk they are running…God only know’s what tasty morsel he is visualising….roast tatties on legs all around the office???  The halitosis was a passing phase….cruel, harsh…yet thankfully swift…watering eyes in the office were not down to the chill in the air 🙂 !!

Meanwhile back at Team Pink…..

Sally is still using the larger wall to measure her success by…which cannot be a good sign…can it???  The dog walking continues but she is convinced that she is just becoming a solid mass of dog walking muscle ever increasing in girth no matter what passes her lips.  Giving up the alcohol alone she felt would shift a few pounds….special K and soup being her main food intake…she should be a mere wisp of a thing by now…??  With the ever increasing murmur of “it must be my age” she is going in for one final push to see if she can re-gain some ground and get back to the smaller wall! Go Sal 🙂

Dee…..back off the “piste” (and the alcohol 🙂 !!) …has been easing herself back onto the diet wagon gradually …embracing wholeheartedly as of yesterday…. and is back to the torment of consuming vats of Tomato soup and crunching on Rivita’s like she is a gerbil hybernating for the winter.  According to yesterday’s weigh-in she has already dropped 2lb, by doing nothing….2 2/4lb of her ‘holiday’ weight still to shift, should be no problem for our star player though…..she has the determination of Rocky Balboa (and the upper arms to match 🙂 ) ….scary Mary!!

Now me (sorry to do this to you!) ….me and my 1 pound….you know the one….now you see it…. now you don’t…..I am absolutely determined that I will win this epic battle and the 1 pound will be shown a clean pair of heels as I race away from it like a streak of lightening.  If i’m really honest although in the first week I was full of enthusiasm I have somewhat taken my eye off the ball and all this winter malarkey is not the best time for me to think about salads or any kind of lighter option (well, not without a massive dollop of mayo 🙂 )….glasses of red wine and bags of onion rings have enticed me, trance like into a position of submission.  But no more….as spring emerges…so shall I….gonna re-calibrate my diet mode and go for it one more time….this time next week I fully expect to be…what shall we say…1 Pound lighter!


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